Thanks for dropping by! Yes, I can’t be more grateful than to have found wonderful people who understand and who have given me so much encouragement to go on! There will definitely be more updates on life here in Singapore! You can be sure of that!

I have pretty much gone through what you have gone through with the Angel and understand how lonely and difficult it can get sometimes when dealing with a severely eczema child. Like your boy, the Angel suffers from multiple food allergies, seen countless doctors (allergist, PDs, dieticians … ) and I’m still clinging on to hopes that hers will go away by the time she is 5 (she has past the age 3 dateline and nothing much has changed) and of course, that we’d get real sleep somehow at night.

One personal experience of dealing with eczema is the environment. I moved from the UK to Singapore and I find the challenges of dealing with eczema more acute in this hot, hot weather. I recently heard of a child who had eczema in Japan where it was cold but once he was back in Singapore, the eczema just went away. I believe that the environment has a very important role in causing a triggers.

I try to deal with my daughter’s eczema by first understanding the underlying causes, the triggers, and assessing if the remedies I have tried work. I admit, it is a lot of trial and errors at times, knowing the right combination of emollient, moisturizers, diet, exposure to the environment, socialization and even routines. Understanding my child’s own disposition also helps to deal with the eczema. I do realise that what works in the UK does not essentially work in Singapore. However, the only constant I have is carrot juice. It does the work of keeping my daughter’s skin supple. I currently use Dreamwash that works when showering or emollient like Balenum or Oilatum (Balenum is oilier than Oilatum) when in the bath. A few drops of lavender oil works wonders in the water, too. Just water and lavender oil and soaking in it in the bath just works wonders. The smell has such a calming effect on us. For moisturizers, i used to use Dreamwash on my daughter. It takes away the itch and keeps the skin beautiful but alas! it doesn’t work in the humidity in Singapore. I was on Physiogel and now, aqueous cream. I haven’t found the ‘perfect’ moisturizer yet I do know that in aircon rooms, I use oil based emollient like Epaderm to keep the skin supple. However, I can only use it at home because I can never be sure, when out, if the temperature is cool enough for it. Oil based emollient warms up the body and my daughter’s skin will then becomes a sort of a furnace! With multiple food allergies, another challenge is the diet. We have a lot of restrictions on what we eat.

She is completely off steroid or medication (unless she has a flare up from allergies) and on some days, we get eczema free days which is what I aim for everyday!

A lot of my time and effort goes into just understanding the disposition of my child in dealing with eczema. With the underlying itch, the child gets into a habit of the mind of scratching and we can go around in mindless circles trying to overcome the itch scratch cycle and the habit of the mind. Even emotional triggers such as stress, anxiety or tiredness can cause her to get into a scratchy frenzy and then the itch scratch cycle. For my child, turning to scratching is her first outlet and that is something I try to work on. Do you notice the conditions in which your boy get into an itch scratch cycle?

I have almost given up on socialising. I keep it really simple for now. I used to live a more normal life in the UK. We could enjoy walks, buy groceries, meet up with friends occasionally, attending baby socials, although eating out has always been a stressful event. Now, I hardly see anyone much; I mostly get visitors at home (thanks to those kind wonderful souls who understand what we are going through), rely on my mom to buy our groceries (occasional trips to the supermarkets - really occasional but not reliable enough to have food on the table every night), and keep socialising short, just so that we don’t get into the itch scratch cycle. The heat here is not kind to her skin and a mere walk from the door to the car is enough to trigger a flare up in her skin! In Singapore, we have not suffered from hayfever yet but I remember in UK, during the hayfever season, my daughter just wanted to sleep away. For night time, I sew up all the openings in her pyjamas (hands and legs) and it works wonders. She doesn’t get into that much of a scratching frenzy and wakes to just get moisturized or a pee break. There are still trying nights but as the saying goes, out of sight, out of mind, it works wonders on my child.

I have also decided to homeschool my daughter now as we are not even positive about how others will be able to handle her situations. Even getting ready in the morning is a challenge, I cringe to think about the ’stress’ of getting ready for school.

My life revolves primarily around with helping my daughter to cope with her eczema. When we achieve eczema free days, they are the best days, but for now, they are far and in between. We are still losing sleep. I currently have not met anyone where I am who goes through the same situation as I do or rather, I have, but I haven’t met one who is keen to share notes like this. I think people were more open to it in the UK, more understanding and well, perhaps have more tolerance.

I know how it is like to have people comment on our children’s skin. We get a lot of well wishes in the UK, a lot of empathy and people do not focus on my child’s skin but my child. Over here, it has been tiring answering questions and I teach my daughter to tell those who ask why she has a perpetual rash that she has eczema but she is getting better. There is no other way round it. We have also given up on going on public transport to avoid all these ‘eyes’ and questions.

I hope you have seen some good days with Tobey since your comment. I know how it is like for us - while other parents complain about one sleepless night, if we ever get that one peaceful night of sleep, it feels like such a gem. Try the pyjamas and see if it works. I keep a journal of sort of her conditions and monitor the triggers. Have you ever brough Tobey anywhere out of San Francisco bay area where his skin or condition has been different? My daughter is completely eczema free in Norway and in some other parts of Europe! I sometimes do wish we stay there!

It really breaks my heart, too, knowing how you must have gone through so much to help to achieve clearance and then along comes chicken pox! I have that fear, too, because when an eczema child has an itch to scratch, it is like no other. It robs them of any sense of ability to control their itch. Both your child and you must have had a hard time coping. Big hugs!

Like I have told Tobey’s mum below, I aim for eczema free days, without the use of steroids and oral medication. It is very hard work but I find it worth it. I try to understand as much about the flares, the environment, etc, so as to understand the factors. I know of doctors who are more ‘liberal’ with the use of steroid, even oral, and others who are more careful. Both my husband and I made a decision to have a definite ‘no’ to oral steroid in controlling eczema (we don’t want to see quick fixes) and while we did go through one round of steroid cream, we also know that it is not ultimately what we want to lean on to control the eczema. So, we are completely off steroid cream.

Your miracle cream from Australia sounds great! I believe sometimes it is really finding the right and suitable cream to suit a particular environment and person, too! I pray that it is still working its wonders for your child!

Thanks so much for sharing your experience with your daughter and your kind words and encouragement. I, too, totally understand what you are going through with your daughter. It must have been a difficult time for you to cope with.

i have gone through one of my worst period with my child on dealing with her eczema crisis and we are almost reaching the point of eczema-free days but there are still bad days, there are still allergies to think of, etc.

I know how you feel about the food intake. When the Angel was diagnosed with various food allergies and we found we could feed her almost nothing, it was a nightmare. Clinically, she is still tested for being allergic to wheat but we put her on wheat diet as we find it hard to avoid and too limiting in her food. However, we tried and tested all kinds of products which contain wheat before knowing what to give her.

In your case, perhaps knowing what her allergies are is a starting point and I do think that you may have to avoid those food triggers for now as her eczema is probably exacerbated by the food triggers. I know how painful it must be for you and for her, too, especially when she has tasted those food and now, everything has to be taken away! I do believe that when the eczema is milder or under control, her food allergies or other allergies might just go away! It does seem to me that she has an underlying case of eczema and it can be further triggered by food (as in the case of my daughter). The Professor I see told us some children’s eczema are worsened by their food allergies and I believe it is so in our cases. I am quite positive that when the eczema is more subdued, the triggers that exacerbate the eczema may also wean off. When my daughter’s eczema was at its all time worse, taking wheat products just made it worse but at this time when it is under control, wheat products have almost no effect on her skin although clinically, she is tested to be allergic to wheat!

i can also imagine how dependent your child is on you, as mine was. I spared no effort or time and watched her and spent all my time and energy on her. I believe the effort will pay off. I know how tough it is and how heart breaking it can be, for us, but the effort will be worth it. I found solace in one of the doctors I saw who totally understand what I was going through with my daughter and well, he really gave me courage to go on. I want you to know that it is really tough but keep going and being there for your daughter because in you, she will find the comfort she needs. And I believe you are doing a good job in looking after her. Don’t let what others say affect your maternal instinct. I shut a lot of people out of my life because they didn’t understand what I was doing with my daughter and the effort has paid off because my daughter has many eczema-free days now! I know that Mother Nature has imbued us with that maternal instinct and trust it to tell you what you are doing for your daughter is right. Be strong, stay strong and stay sane. There are days when I really became a monster myself and cried my eyes out but I remember what the doctor said, it is a long marathon run and I just have to keep running. I know you can do it. =)

And it is definitely a good idea to seek a second opinion. I was in really good hands in the UK and took sometime to find the doctors who can treat my daughter when back in Singapore but once we learn more about the conditions and explore other alternatives, I’m sure it makes it easier for us to deal with the conditions.

Jody, have you tried carrot juice for your daughter? I think we can achieve eczema free days now because of carrot juice. Try juicing two carrots and an apple everyday and see if it works for your daughter.

I really do wish we are nearer. Big hugs in all your efforts to help your child. I know what you are facing and I also know that you can achieve eczema-free days with your daughter! Keep going! And stay around positive people who will encourage you in what you are doing! That’s precisely what I did and it kept me sane!